"Testing the waters"

There is a crop of people in the Church who have still not grasped the whole concept of 'no sex before marriage'.

There are those of the opinion that it is 'safe' to test the 'item' so that one 'does not buy something that is inferior'.

This is wrong.

Sex is not something to be taken lightly. 

The fact that others are 'testing' does not mean you should also- even if you have a few days or hours to say, "I do".

What most of us fail to realise is that sex is not just about two people coming together physically to have intercourse. It goes beyond that.

Sex does not only involve the exchange of body fluids but also the intertwining of spirits. 

Daddy created us for intimacy with Him and just us worship joins our hearts and entire faculties to Him, so does the act of sex brings us into closer union with a sexual partner.

Sex is the highest form of intimacy between a man and a woman. The ability of a man and a woman to be naked before each other and unite to 'make love' is what Daddy expects of us in worship. He desires that we stand naked and unashamed before Him as He freely gives of Himself to us. 

Sex is worship

This explains why Daddy purposed sex to be an act between two people married, in His sight and in the sight of man, to each other.

In His plan, just as marriage is a foreshadowing of the future union between Christ and His Church, so is sex a forecast of Worship which is the eternal consummation of the Church's union with Christ.

Most of us do not know this. I didn't also know till now.

I, for one, have seen the effect having sex before marriage has had on a friend. Before my very eyes, my friend metamorphosed into someone completely different from who I knew her to be. It seemed as though she had taken on another garment that wasn't hers. And, although her true self would surface sometimes, the life of the one to whom she had given herself to had taken dominion over her own self.  

In my opinion, what I would say with regards to this matter is this:

Be led and be convicted in your choice of a partner. Holy Spirit leads and He will not give to you someone who is incompatible with you. With regards to all those thoughts that are capable of running through your mind, He has got you covered. Be yielded. 

And sometimes you just want to know the 'capabilities' of your partner in bed to assess how sexually fulfilled you will be in your married life. Permit me share with you my belief on this. I strongly believe that if Holy Spirit can teach us all things, then it means that He Is also capable of teaching how we can bring satisfaction to our partners sexually. We have got to be willing to be teachable by Him.

There are books which educate would-be couples on the art of love-making and one of such books I am aware of is the "Model Marriage" guide by Bishop Dag Heward-Mills. I recommend you and your partner to grab a copy of this. I wish to quickly add that in all this, rely on Holy Spirit's leadership because Holy Spirit deals with us individually and this means that what may work for one person in a book would not work for another. That is why I say, be led by Holy Spirit.

To conclude, I will export a portion of the Book of Galatians, which reads, 

Galatians 5:19-21 

“Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.” (See also Colossians 3:5)

Sexual immorality is a sin which separates us from God. The more we unlawfully connect with people who are not of God, the more we shield ourselves from God and His love. Sexual immorality which includes sex before marriage and adultery prevent us from inheriting Daddy's Kingdom (which is our true Home).

(Dear Sister,

Please, if you are in a relationship with any man who claims to have a relationship with Jesus Christ and yet insists on you sleeping with him or having any form of immoral act, flee from such a fellow. He is not fully yielded to Holy Spirit as He ought to be and a relationship of such nature which causes you to compromise on virtue is wrong.)

(Dear Mrs,

I am reminded of this truth: you cannot give what you do not have.
You cannot sexually bring satisfaction to your spouse when your heart is not yielded to God through worship.)


Father, please teach us how to worship you in Spirit and in truth.
Please teach us how to stand naked before you just as we are. Please direct us on how to wait till marriage before we give ourselves to another. And when we are joined to another in marriage, please teach us, Holy Spirit, how to keep our marriage beds undefiled. Help us to honour You with our bodies and to honour our spouses with our bodies too. Above all, we receive overflowing Grace to be disciplined in exercising self-control. In Jesus' name, amen.

You are blessed if you rely on and fully trust in the Lordship of Jesus Christ and in His Spirit.

Love,

Mary Magdalene.