There was a time I felt like Papa would use me when I'd attained some level of experience or something...
Doing ministry has led me to times when I've wanted to run away and hide myself because I felt inadequate.
There have been days when I've sought for a million excuses not to do a task because of fear that I'll make a fool of myself or mess up completely... I guess the honest truth has been the fear that people would realise how much I do not know and tag me as empty.
I'm a crazy woman, I tell you.
I have my days.
I know nothing at all...
I always felt that I should attain some level of *umph* in the things of Papa to be qualified as one who preaches Christ.
I guess that makes me selfish because then it seems like this walk is all about me.
But, it's not so.
I felt that at least, I should be somebody with a track record of killing lions behind the scenes or slaying bears with my bare hands.
In my bid to flee, all Holy Spirit said was...
"Trust me and show up".
"Trust me and go where I send you"
"Trust me and do what I tell you to"
I am learning that for some of us, we'll have to face the lions on the battlefield.
We will gain the experience on the field.
He picked us up and placed us on the field.
There was no time for mock battles in the name of preparation.
We are facing the giants head-on as we grow...all on the field.
Trust me, it is not always rosy.
But Papa hasn't taken me into the part of the field where the fight is hottest...the kind of place where Uriah couldn't stand.
He is still protecting me...as He forever will.
....and after I have learnt what I must in this season, He'll take me to the next phase.
It gets hotter by the season.
Yet, it gets better.
...and like gold, we only become more and more refined by the heat.
It is well ❤
Still,
Sharing Life.
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