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Papa...

Father, how do I start again?


How do I eliminate 20-something years of life and begin again?

 Niiella's song keeps resounding in my ear.

 "And if i could turn back the hands of time and take all my pain and then rewind. Go back to the place when I was a child again. And start all over with you in mind."

We Both know the decisions I have taken and the way I have lived.

We Both know that all I have done and all I have desired is Your will.

Why do I feel lost, Papa?

I can't go back to the place of my birth because I can no longer speak their language.

I don't know where to go, Papa.

I feel so lost, Daddy.

I am scared...

I reckon that it is because of my thoughts of how others see me that has made me feel inferior.

I feel like my presence in the lives of some people only reeks havoc.

I see myself to be the cause of how I have been treated in the past.

For this reason, I fear them.

Yes, I see them...and I am friendly.

But We Both see the cage, Papa. 

But You, Papa, You see me.

Help me see me as You do.

Please help me look at myself with the eyes of love.

Please help me love me.

...please... 
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